Teamwork

If you are going to start helping people, you're going to have to start doing the following things. First, you've got to stop imposing yourself on others, and your value systems upon them, you've got to be real and you've got to learn to listen. There are all kinds of symbols. Verbal language is only one. Sometimes by opening our mouths, we make dreadful errors. It's often so much nicer just to look at somebody and vibrate. I'm determined that one of these days I'm going to free myself of all responsibility and study human vibrations because I'm sure they exist even as much as the vibrations that are sending this sound to you. When we find that secret, we may find some means of communication that is a little more adequate than words. I think that listening is tremendously important, and yet we abhor and are frightened of silence. The most beautiful things could go on if we were silent.  You've got to be real. Don't be a phony. Come on as yourself. The hardest thing in the world is to be someone you're not. As you get closer and closer and closer to what you are, be that and come on all the time that way. You'll find it's an easy way to live. The easiest thing to be in the world is you. The most difficult thing to be is what other people want you to be. Don't let them put you in that position. Find who you are and come on as you are. Then you can live simply. You won't be playing games any more. Just clear them all away and say, "Here's me and take me for what I am with all my frailties, all my stupidity and if you can't, leave me alone". Another thing, don't order anyone to do anything. You're not God. You don't know what is in someone else's head. You can guide but you can't order. And try to communicate, try to understand. Finally remember that you are a team. You're dealings with people are only going to be as successful as you are together. You're going to want to plan together what you're going to do because there are greater resources and strength in many than there are in one.

Love

Saying I love you to someone is probably the greatest thing a person can say and do in his life provided we remain true to the meaning of the word love. When it comes to romantic love there is always a risk of saying it, when the two person already in love with each other finally say those three words the answer can be very fulfilling. To be loved back by the object of your affection is rapture. But there are those who like most of us do love someone who's not yet in love with us. So we wait and wonder when will the time come. And most often than not we remain silent about how we feel because we're afraid of getting hurt, afraid of not hearing what we want to hear. So we drown on our own sorrow of not being able to experience a loving relationship. And there are those who choose to remain true to what the real meaning of loving someone, unafraid of getting hurt, unafraid of falling first. Because true love waits and understand. The person who truly loves is never selfish, he thinks of his love before himself, he can take pain in silence and persevere in the distance just so he can hold the person he love lightly. I myself experienced these kinds of love. I experienced being loved back, and love someone back. And loving without being love in return. But I also experienced not loving someone at all, yes I may have avoided pain temporarily but I can't survive not loving... The key is to love someone who is worthy of that love.

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Past

Our past limits us in our efforts to have everything because we cannot change the past. What happened, happened. What we missed out on, we missed out on. As much as we desire it, we cannot go back and do things differently. However, we can change how we remember the past. We can change the way we define our past. We can define our failures as successes and our losses as gains. It is important that such redefinitions have some close relation to reality. People who remember their parents as being perfect are always likely to have their definition of the perfection of their parents disrupted by evidence of their human fallibility. A determined counting of one's blessings, past and present, brings no comfort when one's internal reality contains resentment, envy, despair and anguish. A valid redefinition of the past is possible only when many other things have changed.

Life

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Back To Normal

Sometimes yung pag ngiti ng mga Filipino sa problema is also a sign of not taking the problem seriously. Kaya di nagbabago.

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A love That Is Free

There are love that enslave us and there are love that sets us free. We often approach love as some kind of voluntary enslavement where we offer ourselves to be tied down to a person and just belong to them completely forgetting ourselves without realizing that the only love that is true is the love that is free. Free to make mistakes and free to forgive. Free to love someone and free to love someone back. Free to talk about the future without holding on to the past but without sacrificing the present. The only person who is totally free is the person who can express love that is true. He is bound only by his certitude that love brings two people together without limitations. For you can never own somebody no matter how loving or related you are to the person.

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For You

I want you to know how important you are to me, how you can be the creator of the person that is in me if you choose to. You alone can break down the wall behind which I tremble. You alone can see behind my mask. You alone can release me from my shadow world of panic and uncertainty and loneliness. So please don't pass me by. I know it will not be easy for you. A conviction of worthlessness builds strong walls. And the nearer that you approach me, the blinder I may strike back. You see, I am to be fighting against the very thing I need the most.

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Day 42

Dear Romeo,

How do I begin to pick up the pieces of an old life when I know in my heart there is no turning back... In a man's life being broken is something that is inevitable and here I am with all the heartaches I had gone through still full of hope because tonight when you said I love you too, all those experiences suddenly made sense to me... that even with all those painful experiences, as hopeful as a person can be happiness will once again fill a persons heart if he remains true to the word love. You asked me why do I love you and my answer were the same. I love you as you are and who you are and not what you have or you don't have. I may have not seen your best and your worst but I'll be here hoping for your success and most specially I will be your strenght when you experience failure. I love you and thank you for saving me in every way that a person can be saved.

Gabriel

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Patience

Lucky are those who found love and love found them. Let them experience what they deserve. And while those of us who wait for our turn whether we are yet to find someone or who like me had found the one to love but yet to experience being loved by the object of my affection, must always remember that patience is not the ability to wait but the ability to always be true to someone while waiting.

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Another Day

There comes a time in a man's life when he wish he had made things perfect and easy. But I'm not perfect nor have I made things easy for me and those people around me, though I never stop trying. In a couple of weeks I would be turning 34, old enough to say I've been around but too young to absorb the wisdom that comes with age. We have this common belief that as we grow older life becomes familar because we think we can anticipate what's going to happen believing we have the tools to deal with life. We have this belief that we can have everything but we learn early that we cannot always get what we want and that we may solve every problem but we will never get ahead. We may think that because our life becomes a routine where we do the same things over and over again that every day is the same. But it's not, it's a different day, it's a different world. It's the same sun but it's a different sunrise. Your face and body are never the same. The people you love are never the same. Your emotions are never the same. So never ignore those feelings, those events and the people in your life that provides meaning to who you are. So life isn't perfect and I will never be one. And only the day we become is the day we should demand for others to be the same. So I guess we are safe.

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You and I

It all starts with you, and the great bridge that leads to everybody is your bridge. That's the important one. If I grow and grow, I can give you more of me. I learn so I can teach you more. I strive for wisdom so I can encourage your truth. I become more aware and sensitive so that I can better accept your sensitivity and awareness. And I struggle to understand my humanness so that I can better understand you when you reveal to me that you are only human too. And I live in continual wonder of life so that I can allow you too, to celebrate your life. What I do for me, I do for you. And what you do for you, you do for me, so it's never selfish. Everything you have ever learned, you have learned from everyone.

posted from Bloggeroid

Healing A Broken Heart

How do you heal a broken heart? This is a question that was asked to me by a follower on twitter, he must have read my blog and somehow had the courage to asked me privately this question. I never pretended to have the wisdom to answer such question, although I told him I don't have an answer, I still found my self giving him some advise. The truth of the matter is a broken heart cannot be totally healed, once a heart is broken the only thing you can do is to gather all the pieces and patch it up. You may be able to put it back together but the crack remains, and those cracks reminds us of the risk we took on life for loving someone. When your heart gets cracked, that's when the light comes in and hope that the light brings you back out of the darkness of pain. It is common to say that time heals... the only time can do is to make us forget the pain and hoping as time goes by it gets easier. Pain teaches us an important lesson, we need to embrace it but we don't cling to it. It's okey to cry it out but we don't let it linger. So take as much time to heal, allow yourself to focus on different things, perhaps to different people, you have your family, friends, if needed, go out and meet someone else, what's important is to never allow yourself to be alone with pain. The less you spend time thinking of it the easier it gets to recover. But don't use hate, don't be bitter. Bitterness is when you use hate to get over someone. But hate destroys who you are and not the feeling you want to get over with. And don't let pain stops you from risking again or to betray your idealism. At the end of the day only you would know how to deal with it.

Intimacy

One thing that destroys intimacy is the lack of change. We're afraid of change. Intimacy needs change. It's changing, and everything in it is in a state of change, and you can't expect others to remain the same, they're going to change too. Intimacy cannot be expected. You can have no expectations in interaction with another. No one can always be or do what you would wish of them. Everything comes to you as a surprise, and if you think about it, every downer that you have is because someone didn't meet your expectations. Think about it! Every time you're down it's because someone didn't call or text you or didn't remember your birthday. If they remember it, you dance around the table. If they call, you do back flips and if they text, you do the split! And if they don't, it should be alright too. It mainly requires that you be spontaneous in your approach to relationships. See what happens. Laugh yourself silly over what bothers other people. Predictability is a bore, if you want to be fascinating be unpredictable. The only thing you can count on as far as I'm concerned is my unpredictability. You can never count on what I'm going to do or say. I change constantly. Show what you feel in a relationship. If you feel like crying, cry your eyes out. When you feel like laughing, laugh your eyes out. Scream when you want to scream. And don't wait to communicate your feelings. I think one of the greatest destructive element in relationships is our inability to relate what we're feeling now. I always tell my friends, never have short arguments. The trouble with arguments is that they are usually over before they solve anything. The longer you argue the more you're going to get to the feelings, and so when they start walking out of the room, chase them! Say, "Wait! I don't understand, keep talking!" Eventually you're going to find out what you're arguing about is pretty damn silly. If we need each other, we need each other now. Relationships are disintegrating, separations are growing and those relationships are casual and mostly meaningless. Intimacy is not simple. It's the greatest challenge to our maturity. It's our greatest hope.

posted from Bloggeroid

Making Choices

This is our choice. We can go on as we always have, not thinking clearly, relying on our hope that somehow, by some magical means, it will all come right in the end. Or we can take what we have and recycle or rearrange it with careful, clear thought and create, out of what we have already got, all that we want. We can, as we have always done, hand responsibility for ourselves over to other people and institutions, and hope that they will look after us, or we can accept responsibility for ourselves. The first choice does not give us security, much less what we want. The second choice is full of uncertainty, but when we take responsibility for ourselves, knowing ourselves and one another, we can work out what matters most to us, and order our priorities. We accept what we can never return to the original bliss, but more important, we can leave this world having enjoyed much of what we wanted. What matter that the relationship we had in the past were unsatisfactory and painful? Now we shall enjoy friendship and love. What matter that we missed out on so much? Now we shall make the most of our time. The only regret we can now afford ourselves is that those who came before us wasted their opportunities.

posted from Bloggeroid

For You

If only I could forget
The day we once met,
That day I said I like you
That night I said I love you.

When we said our goodbyes
There were tears in my eyes,
Now those tears are fading away
But the memories will always stay.

I know one day you will just be a memory
Even with temporary happiness I remain wary,
For behind this smile I sill have fears
Looking at you brings back the pain and tears.

Gabriel

posted from Bloggeroid

Different Kind of Intelligence

In every generation there are some people who do possess a different kind of intelligence. They believe that it is of prime importance that we strive to understand ourselves and other people. They see people as people, not as objects to be organized, used and abused, but as a person to be treated with respect and dignity. They see individuals as having the right to know and to express their own personal truth. They try to enlarge the ways in which each of us can increase our understanding, and explore and develop our talents and become all the person that we might be. In different times and places, these people have expressed their intelligence. In the centuries when the Church claimed domination over all, such people insisted on the right of each individual to find and express his or her own religious truth. When the State, in the guise of emperors, kings and dictators or those who claim to know what is best for everyone, assumed total power, these people insisted on the right of each individual to freedom and self-discrimination. In this times such people have protested against war, against the destruction of the resources of the planet, against genocide, torture, starvation, poverty, homelessness,and against the cruelty inflicted on individuals by governments, institutions, and those who lack intelligence about people.

Expectations

To be human is to suffer. We enter this world expecting that we can have everything, but we learn early in life that we can't always get what we want.

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A Smile Behind the Tears

I got a glimpse of possible temporary happiness.

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I Felt Loved

I felt loved. Some by people I knew and some by those who remain part stranger. It may not be by those whom we want to love us. But what matters is we've been loved and it's enough to make my world go round.

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The People We Love

We must never assume that we know the people we love better than they know themselves, or that, even when we believe that our wisdom is superior to theirs, we have the right to manipulate them to do what we want them to do. This means that we have to keep to ourselves our anxieties when we see the mistakes they make, and we refrain from making them feel guilty just so we can keep them near us and enjoy their company. We love them because they are who they are. And we always wish them well on their future, even when that future does not include us.

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